Friday, May 15, 2009

Here Where Apache Tears are the Fragments of Black Glass Stones

I can stop crying now
'cept I'm not crying
because
I'm over medicated
but
if I werent
I would be crying
I can feel that.
and really
I wouldn't
no,
couldn't
cant
stop crying.
I don't get
any of this
but I will say
a lot
of all this
seems better
but harder
harder
at my end
of the pike
than yours
but at least
there is Margo
nearby.
And
the sky
is blue
the weather
warm
the people
embracing
it's just all
not me
not me
anymore
I am
trapped
within
an exile
of an exile
of love
and its a lonely
sort of place
that I can't seem
to get used to.
Waking up
with those dreams
those nightmares
is unbearable.
Nobody
but nobody
knows
or comprehends
and if i tell them
they scold me
about you
so
it just all
reinforces
my social
isolation
and loneliness
I was socially
isolated
and cut off
in Brussels
but not like
I am here
really.
That might
seem hard
to imagine
but my life
is lonelier
and harder
than it was
in that attic
in that apartment
in Sint Joost.
But
I have
to do
what I have
to do
to survive.
It's going well.
True
but me
and my alone
and interior
and subconscious life
are still
though medicated
suffering.
You can't change
any of that.
I'm just glad
my demons
cant hurt you.
no mores...
I'll be glad
when I am
off this planet.
But until then
I intend
to find the desert
again
and the blue sky
and as many
starry nights
from anywhere
on this planets surface
that I can find.
that gives me reason
and hope.
I really miss
those lands
with the calls to prayers
the roof tops there
or the desert rock floor
from the trance
I find
from all those over-lapping calls
from all those Minarets
to prayer.
Not this silence
of life
in the automotive
Midwest...Dreaming
of going there:
Back to Arabia.
That
only that
keeps me
hanging on
with what
I am doing here
if I am
honest
at four
in the morning
I know
I will
never have
such luxury
of travel
again
I will be
lucky
to get out
of this
glue trap
of Ohio
even.
For that
I wish
I would have
never
left
Sint Joost
in Brussel.
But look
at all
I have done
here,
will you
(experience it ever)?
but still
I am not
impressed
with myself
I want
something
else...
I should
have went
to Yemen
instead.
God,
oh no
not
now here
in
no where
Ghettoville
Ohio.
Mustafa_
Matt_
Matthew_
Mathijs_
Mathieu

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Voting for Parks and Nature on Cinco de Mayo

So, here, I, Matthew J. Crouch, being of sound mind and body - (despite being what some call, mentally "ee'ill") - am writing from the Ghettoville-USA blogette desk located in my home between Mecca Park and lil' Moghadishu at
2292 Albert Avenue,
Mecca Park,
Mifflinville,
Mifflinville Township,
The old autonomous area now within Franklin County,
Columbus,
Ohio,
USA

I voted today for the tax levy to help maintain, build and preserve nature while hopefully setting up bicycling paths with the tax levy money...

As you can see from the Park photos taken du jour some of the Area Parks are in decline... and logistical neglect. Me and the K9-unit named Rusty had fun climbing over this fallen tree...

At the voting poling station at the Mifflinville or Mifflin Township Community center behind the Mifflin Police Station I was one of a few
people who had seen the inside of that voting place today so the people working there were quite happy to see me walk in.

While there before voting when asked about the Mecca Park Estates park lawn which is hardly ever mowed - a park with at least two abandoned vehicles from various decades in the brush and overgrowth... I said "A neglected park is better than no Park at all"... Which is true - too much netty maintenance and the natural aspect of a parks conservation becomes out of balance with the nature and ecology of the land and all the life forms it hosts. For certain a forgotten and neglected is better than no Park at all. It beats a McWal-Mart Super Paver Parkinglot anyday.

The post on the limited and unconnected bicycle path had some public made art - graffiti which is the last stand of publically understood Art in these States by the masses - Art that is misunderstood by the powers that be - Someone had scrawled in neat hand writing "Muhammad The King Of Art" - which with its layers of meaning (intended or not) of course appeals to my Islamic sensibilities - for Muhammad the Last Prophet* - who was really the only Messanger who spoke the most of Nature and Art: (Despite the Catholic Churches disregard for that little fine print part of the Bible about no graven images) - So all of central Ohio Muslims should be voting for the parks and recreation tax levy today if they are bothering to vote at all... It seems in this neighborhood nobody is bothering to vote.... Indeed I myself didn't even know there were special elections today until one of my environmentalist activist friends e-mailed me about it.

I asked my African American neighbors if they were voting today - some of whom are inter-racial like our Great New President - Barack Obama - and they were full of out dated excuses from the decades of White Governance and Apartheid politics that ran the USA for its entirety... I guess old habits and ways of thinking - despite the Brotherhood connection - are hard to break even here in G-ville...

For that I am truely sad.

A mind is a terrible thing to waste - here it just isn't the minds that are wasted by cannabis (which should be legalized) and alcohol but lives and generations for people of color have been wasted by economic grid lock based on Aparthied economic isolation American style. This dynamic is Barack Obama's and his Administrations biggest threat - not the Repulligans and their Zionist Military Industrialist Media and McChurch agenda ready to trounce on this great country and resume their greed based economic policies based on lies and no compassion for We the People...

* At this point readers who are Muslim should meditatively reflect on the Peace and Blessings for their Prophet and His Message for the World.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Le Quartiers du Ohio Centrale

 le Quartiers du Ohio Centrale: Ghettoville, Gangstaville, Thuggahville, Nowhereville, Cristelleville, Metheville, Gothville, Cracqueville, Hashville, Redneckville aka Poubelle Blanche-ville - all surrounding the empty car park that is now the ever popular Marche aux Drogues - there really is nothing to do here but go to church and be a religious extremist or be strung out on dope all the time.

  In the photo are some families of tribes of wild geese with goslings afoot... It's not apparent from this photo but this is actually a massive parking lot - this is the reserved green space. I remember when this area between the Scioto and Olentangy rivers - where this view is - well - I remember when this once ridge and valleys was farmland, woodland and wetland with the occassional single family home. That's all changed in three decades though - now that whole area is tract housing, strip malls, apartment and motel barracks that look like minimum security facilities. There are Public Storage sites, car dealerships, condos - housing developments... But the Ohio wildlife Geese still remember in their DNA that this was one of their stops in their North American migrations. Needless to say there is the Ohio Wildlife roadkill strewn about the roadside and parking lots....